UPDATE: A 64 year-old convicted serial child molester was immediately rearrested upon his Elderly Parole Program release in California on Thursday.

National outrage over the parole of David Allen Funston - who had been serving more than three consecutive life sentences since 1999 for convictions on 16 counts of kidnapping and child molestation of eight children between three and seven years old – was quelled Thursday when the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation announced that it had turned Funston over to local law enforcement to face new charges:

Vice President of MRC Free Speech America Dan Schneider joined Fox & Friends First Thursday morning to deliver a sharp legal reality check on two of the biggest cases currently rocking the American justice system: the high-stakes war against Meta’s addictive algorithms and the Clintons’ long-awaited reckoning over their ties to Jeffrey Epstein.

The State of the Union speech is an effective annual exercise to measure how journalists feel about a long speech on national TV by Donald Trump. They hate it intensely, like most children hate broccoli. They would like to scrape that steaming plate into the garbage.

Dave Zirin, who is allegedly the sports editor for the hard-left political magazine The Nation when he’s not issuing nasty, virulently anti-Israel takes, co-wrote “The Ugly Underbelly of the US Hockey Victory” with political science professor Jules Boykoff.

The struggle session continues apace, as the Elitist Media continue to pummel the gold-medal winning U.S. Men’s Hockey Team for having the temerity to A: patriotically celebrate their gold medal B: pound beers with FBI Director Kash Patel and C: talk to President Donald Trump and accept his invites to both hang out at The White House and attend the State of the Union. Now ABC has joined this effort, with a report that is as bad as one would expect.

Near the end of Wednesday’s Katy Tur Reports, Slate writer Mark Joseph Stern absurdly claimed the recent Supreme Court Ruling in United States Postal Service vs. Kanan could lead to mail-in ballots in a “liberal enclave” being destroyed through an apparent Department of Justice and USPS conspiracy.

Jack Hughes delivered the gold medal to the U.S. ice hockey team in the winter Olympics, scoring the winning goal in overtime play.

In a postgame interview, Hughes exclaimed, “This is all about our country now. I love the USA. I love my teammates. It’s unbelievable. The USA hockey brotherhood is so strong ... I am so proud to be an American today.”

ABC News was once again treading dangerously close to serious legal lability. During Thursday’s episode of The View, co-host Sunny Hostin spew allegations - without evidence - about President Trump "sexually assaulting that 13-year-old." A short time later, Hostin was made to reel in her definitive claims with a touch of skepticism by noting what she was referring to were “unverified allegations,” which were being pushed by Democrats and the liberal media.

Mortgage rates have fallen below the 6% level for the first time in more than three years, according to results of Freddie Mac’s Primary Mortgage Market Survey^® (PMMS^®) released Thursday.

“For the first time in three and a half years, the 30-year fixed-rate mortgage (FRM) dropped into the 5% range, falling even lower than last week's milestone,” Freddie Mac’s Chief Economist Sam Khater said, announcing the news:

Not content with Monday’s edition of The Daily Show, Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart took to The Weekly Show podcast on Wednesday to continue his Olympic-sized hot takes about Team USA’s gold medal-winning hockey teams, where he also threw in some bad takes about health care in a capitalist system for good measure.

On Thursday morning, the “Big Three” networks of ABC, CBS, and NBC continued to throw more chum in the shark-infested waters they’ve helped manufacture against the U.S. men’s hockey team for associating with President Trump this past week. This time, ABC cued up women’s hockey team captain Hilary Knight to attack Trump while the others kept the storyline alive the men’s team has a lot to atone for because Trump joked about the women during a Sunday postgame phone call.

Appearing Thursday on Morning Joe, MS NOW’s Ali Vitali conceded there are “valid questions” about Bill Clinton’s ties to Jeffrey Epstein — enough to justify a House Oversight deposition.

But the only connection Vitali mentioned? “He appears in photos.”